Friday, May 28, 2010

DADT Repeal

Gay blogs are all abuzz about passage of DADT repeal legislation by Congress this week.  As I understand it, the compromise legislation grants the president, the defense secretary, and the chairman of the joint cheiefs of staff the authority to eliminate DADT - only when they are completely satisfied that the military’s readiness, recruiting, retention and morale would not be adversely impacted by it.

Is this really progress?  Or has congress simply washed their hands and passed the buck?  Seems more like a clever political move - now during the November elections - when DADT repeal still hasn't happened - they can pat themselves on the back claiming "we tried"

And, mark my word - DADT repeal is not a done deal, especially given that congress also tacked on funding for two Joint Strike Fighter engines onto the defense spending bill - something that both president Obama and the Pentagon are against. Because of this, the whole defense spending bill is in jeopardy of being vetoed.

Clarrification

In my last post I described what I coined homophobe-ophobia - that is, an irrational fear of homophobes.

Let me be clear, I am not claiming that we shouldn't challenge homophobia - I'm just saying we need to challenge their homophobic comments and not attack the people.

There is also the old adage "choose your battles carefully."  During the month of May I've seen the following calls to action for the gay community
  • Call my congressman urging them to vote on the defense spending bill which includes provisions for DADT repeal
  • Call my congressman urging them to oppose the DADT repeal compromise as it makes gay soldiers second class citizens - DADT needs to be repealed now, not at some future date
  • Contact Miller Beer corporation to complain about some recent ads which invoke straight man's fear of being perceived as sissy
  • Contact my Senators urging them to Co-Sponsor the Student Non-Discrimination Act
  • Contact Fox news to complain about Bill O'Reilly comparing transgender people to ewoks
  • Petition Governor Schwarzenegger to sign bill AB2199 which stops the department of mental health from seeking a cure for homosexuality
  • Complain to Congressman King for his statement "if gays don't advertise it they won't get discriminated against"
  • Protest ExxonMobil gas stations because ExxonMobile refuses to add sexual orientation and gender identity to it's non-discrimination policy
  • Contact Fox TV to complain about "Family Guy's" transphobic mother's day episode
  • Contact Marquette University urging them to stop anti-gay discrimination in hiring
  • Contact the South Bend Tribune urging them to print Same-Sex engagement announcements
  • Demanding the immediate release of a gay couple who were sentenced by a  Malawi  judge this week for committing "unnatural acts" and "gross indecency
  • Demand UK asylum for Iranian lesbian actress Kiana Firouz
  • Urge the Dallas Area Rapid Transit (DART) authority to add gender identity to their nondiscrimination policies
I'm not saying that these causes aren't worthy of concern; but, it seems like the gay community has become the self appointed PC Police.  It's like the boy who cried wolf - people start to turn a deaf ear to what gets perceived as a bunch of whiners.  If we're constantly complaining about every little thing then it just becomes noise causing the really important issues to get lost in the clutter.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Homophobe-ophobia

Jonathan I. Katz is a professor of physics at Washington University - and a proud homophobe.  He is the author of an article titled In Defense of Homophobia and blames homosexuals (or "sodomites" as he likes to call us) for millions of innocent people dying from AIDS around the globe.

Jonathan I. Katz is also considered one of  best scientific minds and was invited to help figure out a way to stop the massive oil flow in the gulf of Mexico - that is until he was uninvited after an outcry because of his controversial writings on homosexuality.

I'm not really sure how I feel about this.  On one hand, there is a certain satisfaction in seeing an avowed homophobe get his comeuppance.  On the other hand, are his personal beliefs on homosexuality in any way relevant to the issue at hand - that is, the massive oil spill?    However, his extreme views on an unrelated topic - that is, homosexuality - does call into question his impartiality and logical mindset.  Would his personal beliefs color how he viewed any suggestions made by someone else that happened to be openly gay?  But, shouldn't we be using all of our available resources to find a solution to this environmental disaster?

I think what irks me most about this is the apparent willingness by some to capitalize on this tragic disaster for their own political gain.  It seems that whenever a public figure does or says something that is even mildly homophobic then the homophobe-ophobes start circling like sharks.

Is this homophobe-ophobia really any different than the homophobia they decry? Is trashing those with whom we have philosophical disagreement with the right approach?

While I admit that allowing ourselves to get all worked up in a tizzy over some issue does bring with it a certain self satisfaction - is that really the best way to gain the respect of society at large?  If we want people to respect us, even though they may disagree with us - shouldn't we give them the same consideration?  Seriously, do we really believe that name calling and righteous indignation is going to change the world view on homosexuality?

In my previous blog post I referenced the Golden Rule in the context of the Christian gospel; however, the golden rule has it roots in a wide range of world cultures and religions.  It implores us to treat one another with basic human dignity and respect.

I don't have a problem with arguing with philosophies and beliefs of others - but when we attack the person who has those philosophies and beliefs then we have crossed the line and gone too far IMOHO.  The only way we are going to gain respect is to give respect.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Love the sinner - hate the sin

We've all heard the phrase "love the sinner but hate the sin" (or some variation); in fact, I suspect many of us, in our darkest days of denial, probably uttered these words ourselves.  But, what does it really mean?  Or is it merely a clever sound bite devoid of any real meaning?  Not unlike "gay marriage will destroy the sanctity of marriage"

On the surface, it comes across as saying "I love you in spite of your faults".  But, saying you love the sinner but hate the sin puts the emphasis more on the sin rather on than the person committing the sin. It's like saying "I don't hate you - I just hate certain things about you" - can we honestly call that "love"?  Or does true, honest, and pure love mean that we try to overlook the faults in a person and focus on the good in them?

The word "hate" is such a strong word in the english language - which might explain why this particular phrase seems to be reserved for only the most egregious of sins; although,  it's not applied uniformly.  In fact - I dare say, it's applied to the 'sin' of homosexuality far more than any other sin - perhaps even more than all other sins combined.

Let's say, for sake of discussion, that homosexual acts are a sin (a premise certainly not shared by many who read this blog) - but, just for the sake of discussion, is there really any justification in the gospel to hate the act of loving someone of the same gender?

Jeremy gave his response to this phrase in a recent blog post of his by saying:
I would rather have them hate me then mock me with kindness.
Reading this gave me pause - I had never thought of it in that way before.  By saying "love the sinner but hate the sin" - are we mocking the concept of love?  In fact, in the gospel of Jesus Christ, has the Lord given us approval to "hate" anything? In the sermon on the mount, Jesus taught
But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; (Matt 5:44)
In modern day revelation, the Lord said
I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men. (D&C 64:9)
Seems pretty clear that we, as mere mortals, are to focus on love and forgiveness and not so much on the misdeeds of others.  In fact, Jesus also taught
And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? (Matt 7:3)
and
He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone ... (John 8:7)
I'm going to have to agree with Jeremy on this.  When we say "love the sinner but hate the sin" - we are in effect saying "I love you - but I hate certain things about you."  Implicitly, we are also inferring "and I don't want you to do or say anything in my presence that reminds me of that aspect of you."

This is, at best, conditional love; and, at worse it is, as Jeremy suggests, a mockery of love and kindness - neither of which are in harmony with the gospel of Jesus.

So, what should a person do when a friend or loved one is living a life they believe is out of harmony with the Lord?  Jesus answered this as well when he said
And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise (Luke 6:31)
In other words, if you want people to respect your beliefs and lifestyle choices then you need to respect theirs. Seems pretty simple to me.

[sigh] If only more, so called, 'christians' would actually strive to follow the teachings of the God they claim to worship . . .

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Harvey Milk

May 22, 2010 would be Harvey Milk's 80th birthday.  I'm almost too ashamed to admit it - but nearly all of my knowledge of Harvey Milk came after the biographical film was released in 2008 and subsequent research I've done in the days since.

I lived in California, less than 100 miles from San Francisco, when Harvey Milk was elected as the first openly gay city supervisor.  Sadly, however, I don't have much personal recollection of the events.  I do recall my parents talking about it briefly in a "what is the world coming to?" sort of tone; but, I was young, still in high school, and not too interested in current events.  I was serving on my LDS mission in Missouri when he was shot and killed in 1978 and was not even aware that it had happened.

Contrast that to a year earlier, while on my mission, when Elvis Presley died - when my companion and I were having to console one of our investigators who was totally distraught over the news.  The sad truth is, on the national stage, Harvey Milk was barely a blip back in the 70's.

While Harvey Milk's influence may have been localized during his life - his vision has grown since his death to be larger than life.  I imagine more people today could tell you who Harvey Milk was than could tell you the name of their state legislators.

His legacy has left us with the following memorable quotes
“My name is Harvey Milk and I'm here to recruit you.”

“I cannot prevent anyone from getting angry, or mad, or frustrated. I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.”

“More people have been slaughtered in the name of religion than for any other single reason. That, my friends, that is true perversion.”

“all young people, regardless of sexual orientation or identity, deserve a safe and supportive environment in which to achieve their full potential.”

“If a bullet should go through my head let that bullet go through every closet door.”

“I know that you cannot live on hope alone, but without it, life is not worth living. And you… And you… And you… Gotta give em hope.”

“All men are created equal. No matter how hard you try, you can never erase those words.”

“Hope will never be silent”
While the world is not perfect, it is a safer environment for homosexuals today than it was during Harvey Milk's lifetime - Regardless of where we are - married, partnered, or single, sexually active or celibate, believer or non-believer - all of us have benefited from the tireless hours he, and others, put forth for our behalf.

Let us not forget - and keep his memory alive.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

kicking myself

On American Idol, when Casey James read the text message regarding the judges choice of song for him to perform this week, the AT&T store he was standing in front of at the time is about 1 mile from my house - and I wasn't there.  Now in my defense, I didn't read in the paper that he was coming to my home town until moments before his scheduled arrival.  Plus, I have no clue why he came to this particular AT&T store since he has no ties, that I'm aware of, to my town.  Perhaps it was just conveniently on the way to some other destination, I don't know.

I was planning on going to the parade in his honor later that afternoon; but, it began to rain and I don't take my camera out in bad weather.

Seriously, how often is an American Idol contestant going to be so close to home?  And I blew it!

That said, I was glad that he was sent home last night.  He just isn't in the same league as Crystal and Lee.  If he had stayed and either Crystal or Lee had been sent home then there would be no justice in the universe. 

I am still cheering for Crystal - but Lee really killed it this week and stands a serious chance of becoming the next American Idol.  They say, career wise, it's better to come in 2nd on American Idol because of contractual obligations for the winner.  But, I wonder how true that really is - or if it's just idle water cooler chat.  It's certainly in the best interests of the American Idol franchise for the winner to become rich and famous - so I can't imagine why they would stifle them.

And, in case anyone is wondering, no - I am not crushing on any of the American Idol contestants this season.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Reaching new levels

Someone in Austrailia googled signs that you're socially retarded - and was led to my blog.  So, I guess I can now add to my list of attributes that of being a beacon of social retardness.

My life just gets better and better as I reach new levels - unfortunately, I seem to be headed in a downward direction.

Monday, May 10, 2010

"8: The Mormon Proposition" will be playing in Dallas - anyone interested?

Initially I wasn't sure if I wanted to see 8: The Mormon Proposition;  but, I have decided I would like to see it.  It will be in select theaters starting June 18th, including the Angelika theater in Dallas.  According to the web site, the only other place it will be playing in Texas is the Angelika theater in Houston.

This may be futile, but I thought I'd throw the idea out there about getting a small group together from the Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex to go watch the movie - and then maybe dinner after to talk about it.  I know, from my blogging stats, that there are people in Dallas, Fort Worth, and other nearby communities who visit my blog.

Anyway, if you are interested, send me an email (email id on my blog profile).  It's still over a month away, so there is time to think about it.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Essay: Homosexuality - an inconvenient truth

Some say that mainstream religion hates homosexuality.  I disagree, I believe mainstream religion fears homosexuality, largely because they do not know what to do with  us.  We do not seem to 'fit in' with the plan of creation as it is generally understood - yet, we exist.  We're like a bothersome data point that doesn't fit the hypothesis.  To borrow a phrase - we are an inconvenient truth.

In an attempt to justify our existence, some try to conjure up explanations that do not require them to rethink their original beliefs - just like a scientist who tries to explain away an anomalous data point as a measurement or transcription error.  Most of the other data points lead to the same conclusion - so there is, obviously, something wrong with the few that do not.

They try to imagine causes - such as sexual abuse as a young child, or an overbearing mother and a distant father, or excessive masturbation as a teen.  They label it as unnatural - ignorant of the fact that  homosexual behavior has been observed in virtually every animal species.

We are compared to those with mental conditions that lead them to compulsively steal or abuse children - an insulting comparison as it reduces homosexuality as being all about sex.  But doing so makes it easy to focus on certain aspects of gay culture as anecdotal evidence that we are broken or confused.

Some depict homosexuality as emblematic of all that wrong in the world - making homophobia a powerful political force which unites people in a common cause against salacity. We are accused of conspiring to destroy society and force our deviant lifestyle upon the masses - then irony being, that as a gay man married to a straight woman, my homosexual lifestyle is no different than many of those leading the fight against homosexuality.

Two of us joined together in a committed monogamous relationship is considered so vile as to threaten the very foundation of marriage between a man and a woman.

Children must be protected from us, not only physically since, of course, everyone knows that we are all pedophiles - but also from even having awareness of us, fearing that we will recruit them.

So great is their fear of homosexuality that they seek to censure books and other media that include gay characters and/or gay relationships.  Some even go so far as to conjure up homosexual influence where none exists - such as Tinky Winky, Snagglepuss, even Bugs Bunny - and warn others to avoid such influence in their homes.

In some parts of the world - homosexuality is considered so loathsome that extermination is seen as the only solution.

We are mocked and ridiculed.  We are often the brunt of crude jokes.  To be called a queer is the ultimate insult for a man.   We are taught from our youth that being gay is a choice - one so horrid and terrible that some of us are driven to take our own lives rather than face the truth.  The very thought of being gay causes others of us to spend years, even decades, in denial of our true selves.

And yet through all of this - homosexuality continues to exist, even thrive in some quarters.  Why?  Because in spite of all of the lies, falsehoods, and distortions that are disseminated - truth, however inconvenient, has a way of coming out.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Post #500

Well, this was meant to be post #500; however, I've migrated all of my poems from my mormon-enigma-verses blog to this blog (in preparation for deleting the former) - so this is now post #503

I can hardly believe I've prognosticated and bloviated through 500 posts. In celebration, I will now share 500 things about me that you might not know

  1. . . . OK, I'm bored
I'm not even sure I could think of 500 things; but, I will share a few . . .
  • I'm afraid of the dark - specifically, I'm afraid to be alone outside after dark.  I'm OK in the house, as if a flimsy door or window could stop a boogie man; and, I'm OK outside if other people are around - even if I don't actually see them, but I see/hear evidence that they are around.  But, my anxiety level shoots up whenever I find myself alone outside in the dark.
  • Scary movies give me nightmares.  I'm talking about the suspenseful kind, not the blood and guts kind.  For example, the movie Signs was too scary for me. I don't watch the blood and guts kind either - but that's more because they gross me out rather than anxiety levels.
  • Whenever I am checking my blog statistics and I see that someone from Pocatello, Idaho visited my blog, I think of Steve Sandvoss (Elder Aaron Davis in Latter Days is from Pocatello, Idaho).
  • I think Steve Sandvoss is stunningly beautiful, as is John Barrowman, James Marsden, Milo Ventimigli, and . . . well, I could go on for a long time.
  • I enjoy cooking and I'm actually quite good at it; but, I prefer making savory dishes. I'm really not much of a dessert chef.
  • I enjoy trying new cuisines and things I've never had before, but there some things I refuse to eat, such as:  Organ meats, Octopus, and squid heads (although I love calamari) .  But, I have tried a number of exotic foods, such as snails and steak tartar
  • I love sushi.  I love to make sushi.  I'm not much of a sushi chef, so my homemade sushi doesn't look as nice as those you get in sushi restaurants, but they taste pretty good.  Yes, I do use raw fish in my homemade sushi.  An upscale grocery store in the area carries sushi grade salmon, tuna, and eel in their seafood department.
  • My wife hates sushi (she doesn't like fish in general, but she especially loathes sushi); so, I don't get it very often.  Fortunately (for me), most of my children, and their spouses, love sushi.
    • Growing up as a boy, my mom often sang to me and encouraged me to sing; but, when my voice started changing at the onset of puberty, I quit singing and refused to even try.  Although, I was musical and learned to play a number of different instruments.  It wasn't until college, when I joined the LDS church, that I began singing again.
    • I'm a decent singer - I can sing loud and I have a good musical ear so I sing on-key.  But, I don't like the tonal quality of my voice; so, I avoid singing solo.  I don't even like singing in small groups (duets, trio's, etc.).  I have a blending voice, I blend well with others.
    • In general, I prefer the sound of the male singing voice
      • I love going to Home Depot and Lowes. 
      • I'm pretty handy with tools and try to do all of my own home repairs and improvement.  But, I do know my limits and will call in a professional when I'm in over my head - such as plumbing.
      • I'm totally clueless when it comes to cars.  I've never even opened the hood on my Nissan Cube.
      • I absolutely hate changing oil on a car - and I refuse to do it.  I can't stand getting that black oily grit on my hands.  But, I don't mind digging in the garden with my bare hands, cutting up raw chicken and other meats, or changing poopy diapers - go figure.
      • I also hate shopping for clothes (does this mean I have to turn in my gay card?).  But, I do love going into camera stores, hobby stores, etc.
      • My feet are 9-1/2 EEE - do you know how hard it is finding shoes in EEE width?  I'm also flat footed.
      • I enjoy reading my morning newspaper while eating breakfast (the last of a dying breed, I suppose).  My favorite section is the comics.  Our local daily newspaper has two full pages of comics.  I don't know why, but I always read them backwards - I start on page 2 and read them bottom to top and then page 1 bottom to top.  But, the Sunday comics I read normally.
      • I didn't start shaving until I was older.  On my mission (I was 21 years old when I left, since I didn't join the LDS church until I was nearly 19) I only had to shave every other day.  Even now, having blond hair, I can miss a day without it being too noticeable unless you're up close.  I rarely shave on Saturday's.
      • In general, I don't like facial hair on guys (or girls, for that matter); although, I think a little stubble can be sexy (on guys, not girls)
      • I don't like tattoos or other body modifications
      • But I do think earrings on a guy can be attractive
      • Girls scare me, especially teenage girls.  They scared me when I was a teenager and I've never gotten over it.

      btw, I've shared this before; but, here is my current favorite YouTube video,  If my ward does a talent show this year - I'm going to try to put together a quartet to perform this.  Yes, I know, I don't like singing in small groups - but this is just too good to pass up.




      I also really like this YouTube video; but, somehow, I don't think it would go over too well in a church talent show. Although, it would be fun to see the expressions on everyones faces :)
      >

      Tuesday, May 4, 2010

      Remembering my mother

      Growing up, I was always closer to my mother than to my father.  Not that my father and I had a bad relationship - we just didn't have as close of a bond as there was between my mother and I.  I am the youngest of 6 children which made my mother 37 years old when I was born; so, she was always older than the mothers of my friends.  Her hair also turned gray at an early age (before I was born) giving her an even more matronly look.  When younger, I would sometimes tell my friends that she was my grandmother - something I'm not particularly proud of today.

      Mother was short (about 5' 2") and feisty.  She was a strong woman - she had to be as she raised my 3 older siblings alone while my father was away fighting in WW2; there were periods of time when she didn't know if he was dead or alive.  Myself growing up in the Vietnam era, I realize now that she knew war for much of her life.

      My parents eloped while she was in nursing school.  She would tell stories of climbing out the window of her dorm at night so that she could spend the night with her husband.  Eventually she got caught and was kicked out of school.  When I was 9 years old, she went back to nursing school.  Upon graduation, she started working as a visiting nurse.

      We lived in the small town of Boulder Creek, California and many of her patients were elderly living in nearby Santa Cruz.  During the summer months, I would sometimes go with her on her route and go to the beach to play in the tidepools while she tended her patients.

      When she was younger, she was told that she would likely be blind by adulthood and was counseled to learn some sort of trade that she could do without sight.  So, she became and avid knitter.  The predicted blindness never came; but, she continued knitting throughout her life.  I was always amazed at how she could sit watching TV and carrying on a conversation while knitting complex designs without ever having to look down at what she was doing.  She also did a lot of sewing.  Growing up, most of the shirts I wore were homemade.

      There is a 6 year gap between me and the next siblings; so, by the time I got into middle school I was the only child left at home.  By the time I got into high school, her sewing turned to doll clothes for the grandchildren.  Then she started buying dolls at garage sales and making new clothes for them to donate to needy children.

      As I've shared before, I am a convert to the LDS church, having been baptized while in college.  My parents were dead set against me serving a mission and my father refused to provide any financial support for what he considered a satanic cult.  However, my mother wrote to me faithfully every week during my mission, occasionally including a $10 or $20 bill in the letter - unbeknownst to my father.

      When I started dating the girl who would later become my wife, my parents embraced her and welcomed her into the family.  They were there to celebrate our wedding - in spite of not being able to attend the temple sealing.  When our first child was born, they drove 1½ hours to be with us at the hospital - even though grandparenthood was not new to them seeing as how my oldest daughter was their 11th grandchild.

      While my oldest 2 children were just 2 & 3 years old, I was transferred to Texas where we've lived ever since.  The distance meant that visits with my parents were infrequent but cherished.

      My mother died a few years ago after a bout with cancer.  During this time of the year, I miss her very much.  I know she was proud of me; but, I regret never having told her about the type of son I really am - her gay son.  Looking back at some things that happened while in high school, I realize now that she must have had her suspicions (something I may blog about one day).  I firmly believe she would have continued to embrace me had I accepted myself at an earlier age and chosen a gay path rather than a Mormon (in denial) path.

      During the month of May, let us all take time to remember and honor our mothers.

      Sunday, May 2, 2010

      Blogging overload

      I think I've taken this blogging thing much further than it was ever meant to be taken.  You see, this isn't my only blog.  When I created this blog, I also created Mormon Enigma Recipes and Mormon Enigma Poems.  There are also, of course, the MoHo Directory and MoHo Polls blogs.  But, beyond that, I also have a private blog.

      Did I stop there?  Heaven's no!  I also have a personal blog under my real name where I mostly talk about cooking and gardening.  And, most recently, I started a blog about the Epson R2880 printer to share tips and tricks about how to get the most from it (which produces very beautiful fine art prints, btw)

      In case anybody lost count - that's 8 - count them, 8 - blogs.  Can we say "blogging addiction"?  Is there some sort of 12 step program I need to join?

      I'm not going to leave the blogging world altogether - but I just can't keep up with this many blogs any more.  The end result is that I don't do any of them justice.  Something has to give - but which blogs should stay and which ones need to go?  And, for the latter, do I leave them up for posterity sake?  Or should I delete them altogether?

      A Mormon Enigma - This is my first foray into the world of blogging; and, it has been instrumental in my self discovery as I endeavor to figure out what it means to be married, Mormon, and gay.  But, I am beginning to wonder if Abelard's time is coming to and end.  The name of this blog "A Mormon Enigma", my pseudonym "Abelard", even my emailid "wistfulmormon" all reflect how I felt 3-1/2 years ago - but they are not an accurate reflection for where I am today.  So, I have a couple of decisions to make:  1) do I continue blogging about my thoughts about being married, Mormon, and gay?  And, if so, do I continue blogging as Abelard?  Or should I leave Abelard behind and create a brand new blog with a brand new persona - one that is a more accurate portrayal for where I am today on my journey?  Do I even need to hide behind a persona?  Perhaps it's time to start being a little more 'out' - maybe start blogging using my real first name with the ultimate goal of becoming totally out in the open.  Decisions, decisions, decisions.

      Mormon Enigma Recipes - I created this blog for the simple purpose of sharing favorite recipes.  I haven't updated this blog in a couple of years as I now use my personal blog for recipe sharing.  I'll probably delete this blog once I move all of the recipes over to my personal blog.

      Mormon Enigma Poems -When I first accepted my homosexuality, I wrote several poems in my personal journal.  I'm not suggesting they are of any literary value - but they reflected the feelings I had at the time.  I don't want to delete the poems; but, I'm thinking I'll merge them into another blog and delete this blog.

      MoHo Polls - This started out as just something fun, but I think it's outgrowing it's entertainment value - fewer people are taking the polls, and I keep coming up blank on new polling ideas.  Frankly, of all my blogs - this one is the most likely to be axed.  So, the real question here is leave it or delete it.  Although, if someone else wants to take it over then I'm more than willing to pass the reins.

      MoHo Directory - I'm fairly certain this one will survive the cut as I believe it fulfills a need.  Plus, I don't really have to devote much time to it since I don't actually post to it.  Maintaining this blog has become even easier as I've started receiving emails from fellow MoHo's alerting me to new blogs to add.  But, if anyone wants to help maintain this blog then I would most certainly welcome the assistance - even if it's just sending me emails alerting me to new blogs you've encountered.  But, it would be nice to have a co-administrator - another set of eyes to add new blogs.

      Private blog - This started out as a place for me to share thoughts that I just wasn't comfortable sharing on my Mormon Enigma blog.  It's a private blog using my real name and is a place where I share my raw, unfiltered self rather than the filtered persona that Abelard has evolved into.  Although 'share' is a bit of a misnomer as there are only two other people that have been invited to read this blog.  I guess it really amounts to more of a personal diary.  I'm perplexed about what to do with this blog.  On one hand it hasn't really turned out as I originally envisioned it - I haven't even posted to it in several months.  On the other hand, I'm not totally adverse to exposing my real self to others.  So, if you're interested then send me an email and I'll consider sending you an invite.  No promises, as I haven't decided if I'm even ready to open it up to more people, but you'll stand a better chance if you tell me why you want to see this raw side of me.

      Personal blog focusing on cooking and gardening - this is the blog I share with family and friends.  It's also become my own personal cookbook as I share recipes that I've developed.  I would like to have more time to devote to this blog.  I'd also like to focus more on my photography on this blog.  So, of all my blogs this is the most likely to stay around.  But, it's not a place where I'm comfortable sharing the gay stuff. 

      Personal blog focusing on the Epson R2880 printer - This is my newest blog where I share my own personal experiences with the Epson R2880 printer as well as useful bits that I've gleaned elsewhere on the internet.  It's been helpful to me; and, I think it will be helpful to other users of the Epson R2880 printer; but, I expect the amount of time I spend on it will greatly diminish over time.

      I'm not in any big hurry to do anything - and I certainly don't want to do anything rash.  But, expect to see some changes in the coming weeks and months.

      It would be nice if I could merge some of the blogs.  For example, I'd like to be able to publish private posts that only certain people could see and eliminate my private blog.  Is there some other blogging tool (besides blogger) that allows for this?

      BTW, If anybody wants to see my personal blogs then send me an email and I'll send you a link. They're both public blogs; but, I use my real name; so, I'm just not comfortable linking to them from this blog.  For those of you who are my Facebook friends, I include links to my personal blogs on my Facebook profile.  If any of you are on Facebook and would like to be my friend then send me an email and I'll send you a friend request.