Thursday, March 4, 2010

March theme: First meaningful kiss

It has been suggested that the theme for March be your first meaningful kiss.

Personally, I'm not really sure what to say on this topic. Thing is, I really do not like kissing.  It's slimy, messy, and just generally icky.  Although, in truth, I've only kissed girls - two girls to be specific.  One girl whom I briefly dated in high school, and the girl who later became my wife.

I sometimes wonder if my aversion to kissing is more specifically an aversion to kissing girls.  But, since I'm committed to remaining faithful to my wife, I guess I'll never know.

[big sigh]

Anyway, for those of you more into kissing than I - tell us about your first time when fireworks lit up the sky.


Chedner said...

Heh... I just posted mine today.

Other Species said...

No kiss yet, but I already know what I want and want not.
I would like:
1. Someone to have flossed.
2. Someone to have used mouthwash.
3. Someone to warn me first before they bring me the tongue.

Dang, I'm picky.

TGD said...

I too had only experience with kissing girls and I was not liking it. It was icky, and weird. I had a hard time understanding what the big deal was.

Then I kissed a guy. The first time we kissed it felt...normal.
Later on it evolved into something along the lines of turning on a firehouse of hormones.

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Beck said...

Don't knock it until you've tried it! :)

Philip said...


My most meaningful kiss was with my wife.

Ironically, this kiss lead to the realization that I wasn't straight.

Let me explain.

When I was 18 I was almost ready to give up and surrender in total defeat to my gay feelings.

Then I met my wife and found out I wasn't as gay as I thought I was.

In fact, I started to have such strong physical feelings for women that I started to question if I had been wrong all along and was really straight.

What can I say...I was 18 going on 19 and I wanted to be straight and now I had this wonderful proof that yeah maybe I was.

It didn't take long before I convinced myself that I was straight.

The next two years were spent doing everything in my power to prove to myself I was straight.

Somehow, and I don't know how I did this, I managed to go two years without having any real gay feelings.

Yeah, there was a twinge now and then but my 19/20 year old mind dismissed it as not being the real thing.

That's how powerful the straight feelings were.

Throughout those two years I was a nervous wreck especially because my straight feelings were so erratic. They only happened when I least expected it and never with any frequency.

But each time it was magical.

The straight feelings occurred often enough so in my mind it was OK to get married.

Though to be honest I did have my doubts.

So two years later I wake up from an amazing erotic dream and still in a half asleep state pull my wife over to me and start kissing her passionately.

It was wonderful and I loved every minute of it.

That is until I realized that there was nothing physical about it.

I can't quite explain it but it was like I had forgotten she was a woman and that I was a man.

It was like one person loving another person.

Then I realized the dream had been about a man.

I couldn't remember the dream but somehow I knew.

I tried to force myself to be physically attracted to my wife but all that that happened was that the erotic feelings vanished.

That day was the start of my gay feelings coming back with a vengeance.

Two weeks later I came out to my wife.

And I was in the closet when I came out.

An actual closet like the one you keep clothes in.

So I literally came out of the closet two weeks later even though at the time I didn't know I was coming out of the closet having never heard the terms 'coming out' or 'the closet' or even 'gay' as it refers to homosexuals.

That kiss changed my life forever.


Carter Niven said...

I do not write on my own blog any more... its purpose seemingly done. One thing I will say is that my ex was the only woman that I ever felt comfortable kissing. Unfortunately this was not all the time, and I would often pull away from a kiss.

I kissed one of my companions on my mission. He thought he was bi at the time, and we would joke around by getting close... and once we connected... it was electrical.

The first time I kissed a man rather than just my mission peck was intense. I described it as water after a lifetime of drought. It felt right and good. His scratchy face against my own, his hard body in my arms; I missed something in life that was part of me.

However, I would say that a kiss is just a kiss without the powerful emotional and intimate bonds that underlie a relationship. Kissing because that is what your body desires is one thing; kissing someone that you have an intimate relationship with is completely another.

I honestly believe now that a gay man cannot really have an intimate relationship with a woman. You may have connected on so many levels like I did with my ex, but you cannot experience that feeling of almost wanting to cry because life is so right and so wonderful without a naturally matched sexual partner.

Ned said...

Thanks, once again for the inspiration to write about something that I've needed to write about. Here's my "First Kiss" post.


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Anonymous said...

Abe, when I suggested "first meaningful kiss" to you days ago, I was referring to the first meaningful "romantic" kiss.

OF COURSE, kisses to beloved family members and people whom we love are VERY meaningful, and NEED to be held dear, just as one of your commenters noted.

Just wanted to add a note of clarity to my suggestion. :)

Thank you for thinking the suggestion was worthy of your time and your blog. :)

Happy day! me

Anonymous said...

As an SSA woman, I have kissed my share of men and it has definitely left me... not wanting more. So, I guess I'm still waiting for that "first meaningful kiss."

Anonymous said...

I love kissing! But I havent had any kiss since 3-4 years ago.

My first kiss was when I was 17, with a boy from my school.

We did it in my room and you know the rest... ^_^

Anonymous said...

This was really interesting to see what people had to say. When I first kissed a girl, it was in 8th grade and I had butterflies for days. When I was 18 I had my first kiss with a guy. Now I look back on it and it was seedy and cheap, but at the time it overpowered the butterflies I had felt before. There was no question in my mind as to which I wanted to pursue.

Since then I have kissed many more guys and girls and there has always been a lack of passion in the kisses with girls. I dont feel anything other than a basic physical sensation and I want it to be over because it can be awkward.

With a man, I feel the elecrticity and it feels right. There isnt the urge to pull away. I want to lean into him and lose myself.

Its interesting that based on the gender of my partner at the time I can have a "blah" experience or an experience that leaves me wanting more.

Kengo Biddles said...

Well - I've just squeeked by with mine. It's up on my blog.

(Not that anyone reads it...)