Saturday, January 30, 2010

Pearls of wisdom

On my last post I talked about my journey and how it began years before I finally accepted myself as a gay man - that the road to acceptance started by shedding my own homophobia and learning to accept other homosexuals.

I thought I'd follow up with some pearls of wisdom that I've gleaned over the last couple of years of that journey.  Nothing earth shattering, most will invoke a "duh" reaction.  But they were enlightening to me at some point on my journey.  There are those may not agree with some of these.  Heck, 5 years from now I may not even agree with all of these - but this is where I am today.
  • The so called "gay culture" isn't all about hooking up, guys in thongs, etc.  Gay culture is just as diverse as straight culture.  Yes, there are deviant aspects to gay culture - but there is nothing in gay culture that doesn't also exist in straight culture.
  • The so called "gay agenda" is a myth perpetrated by the wacko religious right   Seriously, can anybody show me a memo that spells out the 'gay agenda'? - I didn't think so.
  • While there are some wacko gay activists who may be the exception, most members of the gay community don't really care what conservative Christians believe about marriage and family.  They just want the conservative Christian community to stop interfering with their families.
  • Support organizations like Exodus International and Evergreen International are primarily run by straight people - saying things that straight people like to hear about homosexuality
  • Homophobia is irrational.  There are no reasons to fear homosexuals that can stand up to any level of scrutiny.
  • Being gay doesn't take away my choices.  I am still the same person I've always been; and, accepting my homosexuality doesn't mean that I have to act a certain way and/or like or dislike certain things. 
  • Accepting that I am gay frees me from feeling like I need to hide certain aspects of my personality out of fear that people might think I'm gay.  Although, being old and curmudgeonly kinda does that too.
  • When I'm with other gay folk and I mention that I'm married - I need to clarify that I'm married to a woman.  . . . it just never occurred to me that I would see the day where that wasn't obvious - just sayin'
  • Guys are like kittens:  They are cute and playful when they're in their 20's - and then they turn old and crotchety, like me :)
OK, that last one was with tongue planted firmly in cheek.

Correction:  In my last post I mentioned that the Dallas American Idol tryout's actually took place in Arlington.  There was an article in our newspaper yesterday offering a clarification.  Turns out the preliminary tryouts took place in the Cowboy's stadium in Arlington - but that the tryouts in front of the judges (the ones we see on TV) actually took place in a hotel in Dallas.  But this does beg the question:  Given how terrible some of the people trying out in front of the judges are - what do those who didn't make it past the preliminary tryouts sound like?  Honestly, I suspect the preliminary tryouts are really looking for entertainment value rather than singing ability.

5 comments:

Other Species said...

I think the gay agenda is the same as the straight agenda or the bi agenda, which is to be looked upon and treated as a fellow human.

Mister Curie said...

Thanks for sharing. Those are some great pearls of wisdom.

J G-W said...

I don't see any of this as evoking a "duh," because I too had to go through the same learning process you did in relation to what it means to be gay.

I would add this to the list:

* Just because you're gay, doesn't mean you have to applaud everything you find in so-called "gay culture."

I really like what you said here:

Being gay doesn't take away my choices. I am still the same person I've always been; and, accepting my homosexuality doesn't mean that I have to act a certain way and/or like or dislike certain things. Accepting that I am gay frees me from feeling like I need to hide certain aspects of my personality out of fear that people might think I'm gay.

That's powerful stuff... No "duh's" from me...

Anonymous said...
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Jon said...

What? Gay culture is about more than guys in thongs???