- Option 1 Mixed orientation marriage
- Option 2 Celibacy and Celibacy revisited
- Option 3 pursuing a gay relationship
- Reject the religion, choose/create a new faith/meaning, and enjoy a “full” relationship with a same-sex partner.
- Enjoy a “full” relationship with a same-sex partner and maintain belief in (and ties to) Mormonism, albeit on a more restricted/limited basis (i.e. no callings, temple, or priesthood privileges).
- Maintain belief and full membership in Mormonism and marry an opposite-sex partner.
- Maintain belief and full membership in Mormonism and remain single and celibate.
However we classify it, this realization seems to be an important part of our coming out progress - but it leaves us with, what can be, a difficult decision: Which choice to make - which path to go down.
- For some, the decision may seem obvious.
- For others, the decision is much more difficult, often vacillating between the various choices or paths for weeks, months, even years before finally settling on one.
- Some find happiness and contentment in their choice.
- Others choose a path and then, not finding fulfillment or happiness, revisit their choices and choose a different path to follow.
- Yet others find themselves faced with a dichotomy between the choice they feel they should make and the choice they want to make. They may find themselves going through a mourning process for the rejected choice which was not meant to be.
Choices - we all make them, or are in the process of making our choice. But, what drives our decision? What tilts us in one direction or the other?
- Is it our physical desires?
- Is it our faith in the LDS church - or lack thereof?
- Is it our fear of loneliness?
- Do our family and friends factor into our decision?
Here in the queerosphere we are a rather eclectic, loosely coupled group - consisting of both young and old, male and female, married and single, religious and atheist, conservative and liberal. The only thing we all have in common is an affinity towards those of our same gender. This is the bond which ties us together, our common trait. Yet, it is a trait so strong that we able to have a rapport with one another regardless of our path.
The queerosphere is a virtual island of misfit toys - only Santa isn't coming to rescue us. We live in a society that doesn't want a Charlie in the Box; fortunately, we are able to find solace and understanding with each other.
As we begin a new year - I just want to express my gratitude for my friends and acquaintances I've made here in the queerosphere. It is through the support I've received here that I am able to accept myself and have been able to make my choice.