You might be a gay guy if ...

This morning while I was working out I was thinking about experiences in my life that may have been, or are indications that I am gay. Then I started playing a game in my mind - a parody of Jeff Foxworthy's "You might be a redneck" routine.

So, let me give you my list thus far.

You might be a gay guy if ...

• You were always the last one left when picking teams.

• You get confused: Is football the game that uses the big orange ball? Or the one that uses the funny shaped ball? Is there a stick involved?
  

• Having a root canal sounds more enjoyable than watching sports on TV.

• You removed sports channels, like ESPN, from your cable directory.
  

• You get excited about going to a new grocery store.

• If the new grocery store happens to have a 'salt bar', you pick out several to try out. Then you go to another store to buy some little cute bottles to store the salts in. Guilty.
  

• You went ga-ga over movies like "The Sound of Music" when you were a kid.
  

• While the other boys were outdoors playing ball, you were indoors playing Barbie with a girl. Yup, that was me when I was about 8 years old. I had a girlfriend and we would occasionally get together to play Barbie. I was always Ken.
  

• Your first crush as a teenager was for another guy. I once wrote a verse about my first crush which I called Unrequited Love.
  

• If a cute couple walks into a room and you are later asked to describe them, you could probably describe the guy but not the girl.

• You've never felt so angry that you wanted to hit something, or break something. Instead, you choose other ways to express your anger such as verbal remarks or the 'silent treatment'.

• You've had an imaginary boyfriend. Beck talked about this on his blog; and, I'll have to confess that there have been times when I've had an imaginary boyfriend - yes, even after I married.

• Your music collection includes "Boy George", "Elton John", and "Enya"

• You get moody sometimes.

• You crave chocolate. And, you use phrases like "to die for" when describing a particularly delicious chocolate dessert.

• You have this weird fascination with guys in traditional female roles.

• One of your guilty pleasures is watching the Logo station on TV.
  

I meant for this to be fun; but, I went back and re-read my list and it isn't that funny. I guess I better not quit my day job.

BTW, here are my salt bottles. A Central Market opened up in our area a few weeks ago. I bought: Cyprus Flake Sea Salt, Murray River Austrailian Pink Flake Salt, Bali Smoked Lime Sea Salt, & Chihuahua de Mexico Wood-Smoked salt.

Aren't they cute?